SNUGGIE
Tuesday, October 13, 2009 at 06:18PM SNUGGIE:
Can you hear the snorting and laughter?
Can you picture the monkish lines and the soft draping of enormous sleeves?
Can you say “Snuggie” without just the slightest twitch of your lips and goofy flutter of facial tics?
Well, of course you can try to remain unaffected, but TV advertising has created the Snuggie stampede, and you damned well better get yours right away.
I honestly try to resist those carnival style shout fests that seem to be on every station, at any time. It’s impossible. And some of us actually become fans of the pitchmen/pitchwomen.
We also tend to strive to catch the trickery used in demonstrating the products’ prowess. How can such magic be so affordable and so versatile? The Sham Wows and scratch fixers look like Merlin, himself, conjured up the impossible.
“So you say you want more for your money? Well, I’ll tell ya what I’m gonna do.” That was the line early pitchmen used in the days of the old black & white TV programming. That was also the gist of the live pitch that could be found on New Jersey’s seashore boardwalks.
The pitches continue today. Cable TV has ensured that the audience is vast and just as captive today as it has been at any time since the beginning of the watch-n-learn approach to marketing. And the ‘something more’ still drives the ‘buy it now’ factor.
The temptation is so strong. The urge to try the newest miracle is nearly impossible to ignore. I have asked friends – even strangers – “Have you tried this?” and, “Is it any good?"
No one I’ve asked ever gave a positive response. No one owned up to a TV ad purchase. But a few bought at local stores that feature an “As Seen On TV” bargain aisle.
My husband fell for the window cleaning tool. It didn’t quite measure up to the hype, but it cleaned okay, if you were willing to spend the time.
Now it’s time to admit to ownership of a Snuggie. HEB (our local grocery giant) has them in every color. HEB displays them where you can’t miss them. HEB is so wise. I bowed to the pressure and bought one.
My husband was with me and smiled all the way home. He carried it into the house like it was a holy relic. (Remember, it is sort of monkish looking.) I wasn’t going to fall for his mocking play-acting. I bought it and, by God, I was going to enjoy it when the chills ran rampant throughout the house.
Then my husband displayed it to my son and the two of them howled. Yes, they howled and I also can attest that I heard a snickering, cheeky clicking. The final outrage came when my son barked like a Great Dane.
Do I care? NO, I do not care. I prefer to believe that they are jealous and extremely insensitive. After all, the chilly temperatures won’t hit San Antonio until mid-November.
I’ll be stylish and cozy in my Snuggie, while I read by the light of the bonus clip-on lamp, included with my purchase. They’ll be shivering in silence. So there!
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