Every time I sit down at my computer and begin a new post for this website, I think to myself ‘I will not cry.’ Time and time again I fail myself and catch my tears with a sleeve or a beat-up tissue and snuffle and blow until I finish the piece.
Life is like that. For me, at least, life’s ups and downs are almost always accompanied by tears.
I’m loud and opinionated and picky. I’m also an emotion junkie. Emotion drives me. I can’t leave it alone. IT must race or grind away to a logical conclusion. And IT must fit my logic or I’ll crank it up, re-title it and begin again.
This blog, if you will, follows a certain logic: If I feel like telling a story, that’s what you get. If I feel like writing a poem, well, you get that; or maybe you don’t get it. IT is what IT is – no more – no less.
Yes, the clichés are at play right now. “I’ve got to be me.” “I want you to want me.” (Oops, those are song lyrics, aren’t they?)
Well here’s the real deal: Without emotion, without feeling, writing might just as well be a strip of random letters on a blackboard; and playing with words is my way of releasing pent-up or remembered strong emotions.
Are you bored yet? I won’t be much longer.
What the hell is she talking about and why is it important right now?
Answer: A Statement of Purpose for this page’s existence is long overdue. All of the above, hopefully, explains why I say what I say and how I say it.
Many readers have expressed a positive connection to my words. Others find it difficult to like my way with words. Poetry is a sticking point. So, I promise to do better with that poetry thingy, that I insist upon conjuring, in the months to come.
I am considering this entry as a vanity piece. I hope that at least a few of you find parallels in your own lives.
That’s IT.